Hey thanks for the request anon! Honestly, this song give me feels. This is my first ever hyung line fic, so thanks for giving me the opportunity and hope you will enjoy it! <3
Mmm, baby, I don’t understand this
You’re changing, I can’t stand it
“Y/N, please baby, open this door,” Namjoon whispered for over a hundred times as he slide down her apartment door. He has been here for hours, begging for her to open the door and just talk to him. They have been arguing for weeks, probably months, that Namjoon lost track on how long it actually is. And the worse part is, its over something Namjoon don’t even know about. Despite their rocky relationship and Y/N asking him for the gazzilionth time to just end the relationship, let her go and just move on, Namjoon doesn’t seem to be able to do it.
Y/N is his love.
She is everything he has ever hoped to find in a girl. She is his perfect match in every single way. The way they met, although is more than a cliche typical love story, their feelings for each other are definitely not. Namjoon and Y/N loves each other very much, too much, they believed they have met that one person that was meant for them in this big world. She catches his eye at a fansign over thousand other girls and he has been pursuing her since them. Relentlessly and shamelessly showing his interest until Y/N submit to her feelings for him that he knows she have.. After months of persuading and chasing after her, Y/N finally opened up her heart to say yes and accept his love.
They were madly in love. They perfectly complemented each other in every way. They spend almost all of their waking time together in Y/N’s tony apartment where Namjoon will only go back to his dorm to sleep when he absolutely have to. Tours that use to excites him has become some kind of a torture to him now. Having to spend months away from the love of his life, with only limited time for phone and video calls and short text messages to quench his longing and desire for her was hell. The boys doesn’t seem to mind their over obsession with each other, as their leader seems to be at his happiest when he’s with Y/N. A happy Namjoon means he is willing to work harder, dance harder, especially on days when Y/N would come and watches him practice, he is constantly in a good mood and with his mind always on cloud nine, Namjoon is able to produced more award winning love songs in a heart beat, all thanks to Y/N. The boys definitely have nothing to complain about their relationship, in fact, they welcome her into Namjoon’s life.
Their relationship has been going on so strong for almost three years, Namjoon was sure nothing would ever break them apart. Sure, they have their off days and up and downs. Which couple doesn’t? But they will somehow always managed to work things out and it will only lead them to develop a stronger feelings for each other. However, for the first time ever since he met Y/N, Namjoon can feel something is changing. Y/N is changing and it scared him to no end to think he might actually really lose her this time.
Things started to go downhill when he went off for on the last leg of his world tour. Months of separation has taken a toll on him. He miss Y/N so much, he is more than ready for the tour to end, pack his bags and went off to see Y/N, taking her in his embraced, making love to her all night long and never lets go. However, about two weeks before he was set to go home, he can sense the distance Y/N seems to be putting between them. Phone calls that she used to eager to received is now left unanswered. Video calls are met with excuses. Text messages are left unread, making Namjoon more anxious to come home even more. The worse part is, he doesn’t know the reason why, and one thing that can make him aboslutely crazy, it is not being able to understand what is happening.
Once he got out of the plane, the first thing he does is run off to hail a cab and make his way to Y/N’s apartment, leaving the boys and their manager in confusion. Expecting to see a smiling and overjoyed Y/N who is waiting for his return, Namjoon is sorely hurt and disappointed when he is only greeted by a cold Y/N who wouldn’t even let him into her apartment or talk to him. Again, without any reason or excuse.
Y/N is changing.
The months he spent away from her made her change.
And his heart cant take it.
He needs his Y/N back.
“Y/N, its me. I’m back baby!” Namjoon knocks on the door with excitement only to be met with Y/N who looks tired and seems like she’s been crying for days. “Baby, what ha-”
“You shouldn’t be here Joon. Please just go,” Y/N spoke between the crack of the door, voice sounded so weak and defeated, it breaks Namjoon’s heart, although what she said should break his heart more.
“Go?” He asks in confusion. “What do you mean baby? Why are you saying this? Open the door and let me in. I miss you,” he smile, hoping Y/N will drop the act and told him that this is all just a joke, a prank to rile him up and nothing has changed. Everything is just like it used to be.
“Please Joon. I… I don’t want to do this anymore. I cant do us anymore. Please just go,” was all the she answer she gave, partnered with a solemn face as she push the door trying to close it shut.
“What? You cant possibly mean that. Baby, I-” Namjoon didn’t get to finish what he had wanted to say before Y/N is already shutting the door right on his face, leaving him in confusion and in dazed of what just happened, standing awkwardly in front of her door with his luggage scattered all over the floor.
Namjoon thought maybe Y/N is just going through a phase, and with time, she will be back to normal.
But all that happened months ago, and the situation doesn’t get any better. Y/N refuses to talk to him at all, or even see him. Still with no explanation or reason from Y/N, Namjoon was left confused and broken, which made him resort to waiting for Y/N everyday in front of her door, begging and waiting for a chance to talk to her.
And today was no exception.
“Please baby… I dont understand, why are you doing this…” he whispered as he leaned weakly and sat on the floor, back leaned against Y/N’s door, whispering the same words he has been asking every day since he came back. Words that he doubt Y/N even hear. Or care.
Namjoon leaned back his head against the door and closes his eyes, trying to think about any possible reason that could have make Y/N changed so drastically. But however long he thinks about it, nothing came to mind except the thought that scares him the most; she just doesn’t love him anymore.
If that was true, what could have possibly change her heart?
“Baby… what made you change? Dont you love me anymore? Did you change your mind? Did you decide that I’m not worth to love anymore?” he will always whisper into the cold, still night air, intending for Y/N to hear him but with a voice so weak and defeated, nobody would be able to hear the cries of his broken heart.
Namjoon will spend the whole night curled up in front of her door, believing that she will finally reveal herself one day if he didnt give up and only goes back to the dorm when the sun has risen as he still have his responsibilities to fill. Looking at the tired and a broken down Namjoon everyday worry the boys but they know they should give their leader time before they starts to interfere.
“I love you so much Y/N. I’m not going to give up on us. On you. Never.I love you. I will see you tomorrow love,” Namjoon leaned his forehead against her door as he softly speaks through it every morning before he left, hoping that one of these days Y/N will hear the plea of his heart.
Little that he know, every night that he spend leaning and whispering through the door, Y/N is right on the other side, leaning back, hearing every single thing that he said while clutching her aching chest, trying to calm her broken heart while trying hard to muffle her cries from Namjoon’s hearing.
My heart can’t take this damage
And the way I feel, can’t stand it
Namjoon is going crazy. He cant think of anything else other than Y/N. 24 hours a day, seven days a week, the only thing on his mind is Y/N. Months has passed and Y/N still didnt even give him a slightest reason on why she’s doing this. Namjoon’s heart is broken beyond repair and its taking a toll on everyone around him.
Is this how it feels to die from a broken heart?
He asks himself as he lay down flat on his bed, flipping through photos of him and Y/N in his phone.
Where did everything went wrong?
The memories of the two of them sharing smiles and laughter flooded his mind.
Why did everything change?
He touched his wet cheeks from the tears that he dont even know is rolling down from his eyes.
What happen Y/N? Please tell me. I dont think my heart can take this any longer.
A soft knock on his door makes Namjoon raised his head to see Jin leaned against his doorway, a sad smile on his face as he looks down at his broken friend and leader. It hurts Jin to see someone who is always so charismatic beaten down to a pulp like this.
“Hey Joon, can I come in?” Namjoon only answered with a weak nod and Jin walks in to take a seat besides him on the bed. “What are you doing? Are you thinking about Y/N again?”
Namjoon closes his eyes and sighed. No one understands what he’s feeling and he hates to answer all this questions when all they are going do is judge him and tell him to move on.
But how can someone just move on from being in love?
“What else am I supposed to do hyung?”
Jin sighed. “Joon. Its been months. I think Y/N has made herself perfectly clear on what she wants. Dont you think you should move on too? Isnt that what she would have wanted you to do?” Namjoon straighten himself up and clasped his hands together under his chin, his head hung low.
“How can I do that hyung? When she doesnt even tell me why she’s doing this? I thought about it every day but nothing makes sense. I dont understand,” he huffed. “My feelings for her is not like running water that I can just turn off whenever I want to hyung. My feelings for her is real and with her doing this… I… I…”
“What is is Joon?”
“I feel like dying,” he closes his eyes as if to recall the devastating feelings before continuing. “The way I’m feeling, the way my heart is breaking… I cant stand it hyung,” Namjoon buried his head in his hands. Jin softly run his hands down Namjoon’s back, patting him as an effort to try to comfort him. He himself is not an expert in love, how is he supposed to say words that would help calm Namjoon’s heart?
“I dont know what else to say Joon. But I just hate seeing you like this. All of us do. We are all worried about you,” Jin paused as he stare straight ahead at the blank wall. “But always remember that you are not alone. You will always have us,” he softly stood up and heads for the door.
Namjoon maintained his position for a while longer as he rethinks and rethinks about everything that had happened in the last few months. Finally, with ultimate determination, he stood up and grabs his jacket. He is going to get his answer, and he is going to get it tonight.
Girl, you’re making it hard for me
“Y/N, open up this door or I swear to God I have no problem to break it down!” he yelled as his fist bang against the door, making the wood creaks loudly. He had enough of being Mr Nice Guy. Y/N is going to give him the answers he wanted tonight whether she likes it or not. After the banging continues for almost another 15 minutes, making the neighbors around pokes their head through their door to see what’s the commotion that’s happening and only to be met with Namjoon’s sneering, Y/N finally open the door.
Namjoon quickly steps in before Y/N have a chance to lock him out again. He only realizes what Y/N looks like after locking the door and turning around to face her. Honestly, she looks worse than he is. Her face pale and colorless, dark eye bags all over her eyes as if she hadnt have enough sleep for the last few months, eyes red and swollen, signs she too has been crying non stop and she looks so skinny, that her collarbone shows and protrudes against the loose collar of her oversized t shirt.
“Ba…baby, why are you like this? What happened to you?” Namjoon pulled her into his embraced as Y/N just stood still like a statue, submitting to his every touch. He released her after a while and peeks at her sunken face.
“Baby, please. Please tell me why you are doing this? What happened between us?” He plead. Y/N closes her eyes for a bit before opening it back to stare into his, hollow and blank.
“Why are you here Joon? I told you. I told you I dont want to do this anymore,” her quiet voice that Namjoon missed so much finally filled the air.
“No. I know you dont mean that baby. Can you just tell me what’s going on? Whatever it is, we will work through it. We always do,”
Y/N looks at his face as tears starts to pool at the corner of her eyes. “No. Not this time Joon. I dont deserve you. Please just go,” she begged. Namjoon grab her shoulders and shake her.
“No! I’m not ever going to let go. Y/N please. My heart cant deal with this anymore. The damaged it went through for being apart from you… I cant baby,”
“Joon, you dont understand. Please…”
Namjoon shakes his head. What is Y/N talking about? Why is she saying all these things? What dont he understand?
“Then make me understand Y/N. Tell me. Show me. Explain to me. Whatever it is, as long as I dont lose you, I know I can handle it,”
Tears starts to fall more rapidly down her sunken cheeks at his words. Namjoon dont understand any of it. What has made Y/N so broken?
“Joonie… I love you,” her voice is so low Namjoon had to take a step forward to actually hear her. But once he did, once the long awaited the love confession reached his ears, his broken heart soared. Hope starts to rise for him again.
“Baby. I love you too. I love you so much. There was never even a second that I have stop loving you,” he gave her swift butterfly kisses all over her face. “Please tell me baby. Make me understand. Mend my broken heart that only you can fix,”
Y/N closes her eyes as her tears is no longer able to stop from spilling out. After a long paused, she finally opened her mouth
“I’m pregnant Joon. And its not yours,”
PART TWO PREVIEW
A/N: I am planning to turn this into a two shot, where the second part has nothing to do with the song, but everything to do with the story. I feel like Y/N deserve another chapter to explain what actually had happened. Give me your opinion if you think I should continue?
Namjoon held the door from letting Y/N slammed it shut on him again. He looked deep into her eyes and he is convinced that Y/N still loves him. He dont understand what is going on, and he want answers now!
“Dont you dare Y/N,” he warned. “I know you didnt cheat on me. I know you are not capable of that. You love me and I can see it. Tell me what happened Y/N. Tell me and let me love you again,”
Y/N released her hold on the door and Namjoon take the opportunity to wedged himself in. She lowered her gaze as Namjoon stand in front of her and her tears rapidly fall to the floor.
“You are right Joon… I didnt cheat on you. I…I… I was…”